Lipton leejiye… 😂

In dining room of an Officers Mess, a flamboyant, tired Captain tells steward to serve a cup of tea…..

“Jawaan! Aisi chaaye pilaao, kay buss! pharrkaa de………meri aankhein baahir aa jaayein…..dimaagh ki batti jal jaaye….aqal kaam karna shuru kar de….. Chal shabaash…”

Steward poked his head into the adjacent kitchen window, and loudly yelled….

“Cook Badshaah! Aisi chaaye pilaao, kay Saahb ko pharrka de….unki aankhein baahir aa jaayein…..dimaagh ki batti jal jaaye….aqal kaam karna shuru kar de….

Chal shabaash…”

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Height of ………. 😄😄

موصوف کا قد اِتنا چھوٹا تھا، کہ پریڈ کے دوران پتا نہیں چلتا تھا کہ رائفل “بازو فنگ” میں ہے یا “نیچے فنگ” میں۔۔۔

 

Fauji bicycle

You may have heard the story of a young Army Officer in the 1960s era, who got a bicycle loan and purchased one from the unit canteen.

The bicycle was a beauty (the way motorbikes/cars are today) but didn’t have a carrier at the back.

So the Officer sent his batman to get one fixed.

When the bicycle came back with the carrier fitted, the Young Officer noted that the stand was missing.

He went to the CSD authorized bicycle dealer and asked him why the stand had been removed.

He was told, “Sahib-ji, Fauj me ek hi cheeze mil sakti hai – ‘Career’ ya ‘Stand’.
Agar stand lo ge to Career khatam, or agar career banaana hai to stand kabhi mat lena.”

سائیکل کا ڈرائیونگ لائسنس, ایک کپ چائے اور شکوہ شکایت

www.hilal.gov.pk/index.php/hilal-urdu/item/2942-2017-08-08-08-28-22

 

Excellent, as always…

God Bless you Sir…

 

Dialogue – 106 (‘Emergency’…)

“Nursing…! Nursing..!”

“Sir…”

“Jaldi se aao….. First aid cupboard kholo… Aik jawan giraa hai post se abhi abhi…”

“Pur Sir….”

“Pur Sir kiya…!???”

“Sir, wo to locked hai…”

“Tau kholo na lock….”

“Sir uski keys hamaaray paas nahin hein…… Headquarter mein hein…. Main key-box mein….”

“HEIN…!!!….”

“Ji Sir…”

“Pur kiyoon!….”

“Sir wo last inspection kay baad yehi decide kiya thaa command ne….”

“Ok… Lock ko torro…. Samaan nikaalo first aid ka…”

“Pur Sir wo lock sealed hai….. Usay torra to inquiry ho gi….”

“Wo mein dekh loon ga….”

“Pur… Sir…..”

“Ab kiya hua…!!!??”

“Sir, wo first aid ki cupboard mein jo samaan hei na…..”

“Haan….. Kiya expired hai..!?..”

“No Sir…. Actually wo samaan “emergency” kay liye rakha hua hai hum ne….”

 

 

 

[Iss dialogue kay tamaam kirdaar, waqeyaat aur situations zaroori nahin kay farzi houn….]